His Gift of Love

-Deepa Dumblekar

Very few people know that loneliness is a state of mind and not a physical condition, which is why we can be in a crowd and yet be very very lonely. It was when I stepped into the 30s a single woman that I realized I was terribly lonely and it hurt.

I had a loving family – doting and caring parents, understanding siblings and their spouses, and nephews and nieces too. Yet, I sensed there was none I could call my own. My nephews and nieces were just that, despite the loving rapport we shared.

A single mother describes her passage from aloneness to togetherness in her new family

It is at this juncture that I contemplated adoption.

I recollect how I had, in my teens, fantasized adopting a baby after marriage. But Man proposes and God disposes and ultimately I ended up adopting as a single woman.

Adoption as a concept had always interested me and having been a voracious reader on various subjects, I had read a lot about it. I had attended a workshop on adoption organized by SuDatta, which was the only formal platform where I heard adoption being discussed. I didn’t feel the need to go for any counseling sessions – I had it in me to be a mother and my heart knew it.

It was less than eight to ten months from the time I went around enquiring at various agencies to getting Payal into my heart, life and home (in that order). Since then, single motherhood has been a long journey, involving both smiles and tears. Nevertheless the joy of being an adoptive family has been made even more special by our being in SuDatta.

The following verses – addressed to my daughter – encapsulate my thoughts on the bond that is there between us.

Before you came –

My life seemed empty, I felt lonely
With love felt from a distance
None was mine; they were all “others”
To them my love and care were pittance

After you came –

Life is full and lovely
We belong to each other well and nicely
I thank God for His unique blessing
He has gifted you to me so wisely

I have strived hard to shoulder the responsibility of being a single mother as successfully as possible, and at times, feel overwhelmed by the task of looking after my little angel. It is then that I focus my mind on the following verse from a favourite hymn.

I accept you from the hands of my God
You are God’s gift to me
A beautiful gift
This gift of love, God has given me

I believe God had a purpose in His mind when He put Payal into my care. Together, we look after her – and I should say we are doing an excellent job!!!